MsKitka.com

Happy Halloween boils and ghouls! Today is the day when the veil between the living and the dead is so thin that the spirits are able to pass into our realm… but that’s not the scary part.

Today is also a day when parents need to be on the lookout for their children, making sure that when they go out trick-or-treating their kids are warm (safe from the cold), healthy (safe from razors in their candy apples), visible (safe from cars) and that their masks aren’t blocking their eyes so that they can cross the street without impaired vision. This year, however, America is most concerned about a different threat: the sex offenders.

Many states are enforcing a curfew tonight to keep sex offenders from roaming the streets and abducting children. The curfews begin between 3 and 7pm (depending on the state) and force sex offenders to stay indoors. The most organized state seems to be New York, where Governor George Pataki has ordered Level 2 and Level 3 sex offenders to stay in their homes. This is smart because not every Level of sex offender preys on children.

The problem, however, is that you can keep the sex offenders from the children, but you can’t keep the children from the sex offenders. There are still a few horrifying scenarios that can come from children visiting the homes of sex offenders at Halloween:

• If not closely watched by parents, children can be invited inside;
• The sex offender can use Halloween as an opportunity to meet and greet his/her young neighbors and take advantage of them at a later date;
• Children can be invited to come back to the house and lured with the promise of more candy and more fun;
• Sex offenders can learn the name of your child on Halloween and target them for abduction at a later date from the local park.

So, simply forcing sex offenders inside for the evening isn’t really going to do much. As a parent, the only logical resolution is to know thy enemies. Therefore, here is Ms. Kitka’s guide for a happy and safe trick-or-treating experience with your little monsters:

• Do not allow your children to trick-or-treat without adult supervision;
• Take the children only to houses that you already know are safe;
• If you don’t know the area and enjoy being social, check with your city council to find out where the sex offenders are living so that you can avoid their homes like the plague;
• Make your children wear masks so that the sex offenders can’t see how absolutely adorable (molestable) your child is.

Thankfully, I don’t have any children to worry about…

Earlier this week I was interviewed by my favorite sex blogger and the only podcaster I listen to on a regular basis, Sam Sugar. To listen to the show, link here:

Podnography #13 - Ms. Kitka, Audiocrush and Max Hardcore

For those of you out there who are Guns n’ Roses fans out there, you know how the next line in the song goes…

A few years ago I thought how wonderful it would be if Hilary Clinton were to run for President in 2008. I was made fun of time and time again, but I stood by my claim thinking that it would be a positive step into America’s future to have a female president. Well, the truth is… it would be great to have a female president, but I was wrong about Hilary.

I lost all respect for Ms. Clinton back during the GTA debacle. Rabid censorship should not be a party platform for Democrats, but it seemed that Clinton was trying to win over the affection of undecided voters and the concerned Christian population. In the process, she destroyed any credibility she had by being the fists of fury that drove GTA to an R rating. Her worst mistake was probably listening to this guy.

Now, Larry Flynt is claiming that Hilary has pissed him off so much that he’s thinking of becoming a Republican:

On August 25, the celebrated pornographer donated $1,000 to Mrs. Clinton, according to the third quarter filing by the former first lady’s Senate campaign.

But less than a month later, Hillary returned the check.

Flynt, a lifelong Democrat, was so insulted by the gesture that he says he is going to have to find another political party to support. [I suggest that he move to Canada and run as a candidate in the Sex Party.]

This wasn’t the first time that Flynt had made a donation to help the Clintons, he also aided them during the impeachment battle in 1998 by providing third party financial support.

So, now we see the real Hilary. The Hilary that really is a social climber… who would stop at nothing to reach her goal. The Hilary who would sell out to religion in order to win votes. I was warned years ago that this would happen, but I didn’t believe it… not until now when I see that she is closing herself off from her own liberals to cater to the right. I don’t see why she doesn’t just join the Republican party…

The problem with women in politics is that some believe that they have to be tough like men in order to make it to the top. I, however, would like to think that there are other ways to make it to the top besides:

1. Acting like a man;
2. Geting promoted by your father (the boss), or;
3. Sucking your boss’ cock.

[Warning: Do not mix numbers 2 and 3 of the above situations…]

I’d like to think that someone out there wants to promote me because of my hard work and dedication.

And so I say to you, Hilary: stop acting like such a twat… the reason we loved your husband so much was because he was easy going. If you want even half the cheering squad that he has, you should stop being so conservative on ridiculous issues like pornography in video games. Which is worse, sex or violence?

A couple of months ago the results from two different studies on women’s sexuality emerged to state that women who are heavyset or on birth control have a lower sex drive than women who are not. This week, test results from a Canadian study have gone further to say that educated women are also more likely to have lower sex drives and more painful sex during intercourse:

The research, which is published in the current edition of The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, found that 55 per cent of respondents had one or more of three concerns about sexual function: low desire, pain during sex and infrequent orgasm during intercourse.

Contrary to the researchers’ expectations, university-educated women are more apt to have low sex drives — 48 per cent compared to 31 per cent among high-school graduates. They are also less likely to have orgasms during intercourse.

“It may well be that highly educated women are different from less-educated women in many respects. Maybe they have higher standards . . . higher expectations and legitimately lower evaluations. They may be living much busier, much more stressful lives,” said William Fisher, a professor of psychology and obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Western Ontario who is a co-author of the paper.

So, should I have dropped out of high school? Probably not. But, still I wonder if I would have a higher sex drive had I done so…

In a conversation with a friend yesterday, my friend mentioned how strange it is that the majority of female sex bloggers are very highly educated. Some are grad students, some are librarians and others (like me) have a university degree and work for foreign diplomats. Isn’t it ironic that the women who were mentioned as having a low sex drive are the ones writing about sex?

I heard it a million times from my mother growing up: “If all your friends jumped off a cliff, does it mean that you have to follow?”

Well, it looks like Thailand thinks so. It’s been just over a month since President Bush declared a war on porn and now the Prime Minister of Thailand is jumping off the cliff to follow him:

At long last, social problems are gaining the attention of Prime Minister Thaksin Shinawatra. Speaking on his weekly ‘’Meet the People'’ radio programme last Saturday, the prime minister said he would launch a ‘’D-Day'’ against social problems on Dec 1. The month-long campaign will target pornographic materials now available in shops, roadside stalls and on the Internet. Internet cafes which promote online gambling and sexual encounters will also be eliminated.

This isn’t what the world needs… the world needs people to strike out against child porn and human trafficking, not adult consensual entertainment.

President Bush has opened a whole can of worms by declaring a war on porn. By declaring this a ‘war’, he has basically said that other things like child porn and human trafficking are less important. How would he feel if his two drunken party-girl daughters were kidnapped and sent to work in brothels in Eastern Europe, servicing at least a dozen men a day?

This article was obviously written by someone who is very much against pornography, but it is interesting to see how far the Prime Minister is willing to go to obliterate porn in his country. The Prime Minister actually stated that he would “remove government officials if they fail to tackle social problems in areas under their jurisdiction“.

Gees… I really hope Bush is oblivious enough not to find out anything about the Thai’s iron fisted model!